1. Kobe Bryant is awesome.
2. My two ex-boyfriend's birthdays will be on the 12th. Who do I greet first, the one I loved more? Kiddin :p
3. Bourjois Mineral Radiance Powder and Cotton Body's tankini. TEMPTATIONS! But NO, I must save. Huhu.
4. I fell in love with iced coffee this year. 2008 was with soy milk.
5. Wishlist : G11, 2010 Planner in red, electric sewing machine (not final will be adding more cos am materialistic, haha!)

I have subscribed to Bo Sanchez' newsletter and this one I want to share because it really hit me. Hard. It's quite long but it's worth the read. Clickety!

I sort of decided that I'm past/over the LDR scenario. I have failed all the trials and waved the white flag. But it's just funny how fate is trying to test me and wanting to knock me off my senses. Fate come on, play fair. The one thing I don't want in the first place. The uncertainty. The waiting. The painful waiting. Sometimes I just want to cry cos am afraid of failing myself again. That I'm going to fall apart and thus the cycle continues. I fall apart and next, pick up the broken pieces just like the old times. I can even pick up the pieces with my eyes closed, metaphorically speaking of course. Perhaps after my last relationship, I haven't been able to stand up on my own two feet. I don't feel the need to. Would that hinder/keep me from being happy? If I impose a time-out? And now comes the defeaning silence. It gets lonely. It really gets lonely most of the time. How I do cope up? How the hell do you cope with that? Or you simply you just couldn't?

I'm still sticking to my #1 Rule. No more LDR.

I'm sick right now, like again. I guess am just burnout and badly need a vacation A.S.A.P. Argh, it's kind of annoying that my topic is usually about "going home". Obviously, I don't have a life. Anyway, things are going to change next year. I promise.

Wall Climbing.
I'd like to pursue Wall Climbing.
It was my first time to try last Tuesday and right now my entire body is sore. *__*

Skateboard.
I cannot find time to practice honestly. I'm always distracted with my laptop. Though I like being outdoors, sometimes I can very be lazy. Perhaps I need to meet a skate-buddy. I've been pondering about selling my board and start to buy longboard parts whenever I have money then assemble it myself. I'm sure I can find some tutorial in the interwebz. Crossing-fingers.

Concerts.
Ahh, one of my favorites. I really love going to concerts, gives me a different high. 2010 looks so promising; Green day, Yeah Yeah Yeahs and Muse. I'm most interested with Yeah Yeah Yeahs although I don't exactly own single album but I listen and love their songs. Maybe, it is not too late, eh? I must download their album soon.

iPod Nano.
Speaking of music, I need to "upgrade" from my jurrasic Samsung player. Ho-hum, 1GB music player. Haha, I knooooow. :P That's the first in my To-Buy list this January.

Camera.
And yes, speaking of UPGRADE. My Pentax P&S needs to retire. My bets are LX3 or G11.

Traveling.
Definitely, more travels for me next year! Hopefully, it will help me in managing my expenses.

Macbook Pro.
'Nuff said.

Love life.
(uhhhh...)

So these are my plans so far, makes me look forward for the next year. And this is not my year-end post yet. :D

I cannot possible construct the best sentence to describe how I feel about the Eraserheads music right now. Oh man, I love their music. They remind me of grade school days and Manong Noel who never got tired of them. Ely Buendia, I love you! Wooo fan girl, yo! Haha! I'm proud to be Filipino.

Movies I should not miss to watch:

2010 cheesy and mushy movie! not cute.
Astro Boy
Where The Wild Things Are
9

Coraline
Lost in Translation
Before Sunrise
Before Sunset
The Science of Sleep
Tristram Shandy
Pan's Labyrinth
Casino Royale
Stranger Than Fiction
The Departed
Superman Returns
The Incredibles
Wall-E (watched 3/4 only)
Kill Bill
Godfather
Batman Begins
Closer
Brokeback Mountain
Freaks and Geeks
Rushmore
Forgetting Sarah Marshall
Love Actually
Lord of Dogtown

I slept to the sound of NIN's The Downward Spiral album. Yes, that's already considered angst music to me. I've been waiting for text message from my mom since Globe Telecom had been crappy since yesterday morning. It's my granny's birthday today, that should be enough reason for me to be in a happy-mood but I instead started the day doing laundry and became so impatient. I cried myself while taking a bath and again before sleeping. HAHAHA. I'm just emotional and cranky lately. No I'm not even sorry. :P

I love the sunshine. I'm very sad of what's going on back in the Philippines. Lucky that my place didn't experience any flood in spite of the heavy rains and winds however my heart is crushed every time I hear and see people losing their homes, lives and almost everything. I cannot imagine how painful would that be. I know God has a plan and although it's hard to understand, for now, eventually it will make sense.

Like how the person who made me happy again is recently avoiding me. Okay, not really avoiding. It's just that I need him more than he does to me. Sucks right. It makes sense now, though. It made better sense after I read the letter Marta sent me.

So. Thank you, Marta and God. :D I'm not totally back on my own feet but I'm halfway there. Okay I should end it here and back to planning about my vacation.

I screwed up again. I am back to this rot state, it's a cycle. :(

Another month is about to end and I couldn't help but to feel tad sad of how I run my life lately. I'm thankful of His blessings to me. But I should start noticing the red light and stop. Please help me God. I'm drained and out of my mind.

My ex-boyfriend just proved again that my decision is right. He cannot play innocent with me. He can't just manipulate my feelings, give me the emotional blackmail plot all-over again. Really, come on. It's like watching a basketball replay game. It saddens me though, that we really cannot be friends. </3

Right now, my concern is to save up enough money for my December vacation and other than that are just merely minor issues. I don't care if my so-called friends are not playing their role so well. Do I always have to be the one who should take the initiative? Thank God for family. And thank God for my job. I'm excited for the Bora trip with mother bear. Weee! Should scout for more swimwear soon. :D

Long weekend recap:
500 Days of Summer - I loved the movie! I loff Tom Hansen. He's just adorable and NOM NOM NOM. Haha. I hope I find a guy like him. I want to have someone who will love me the way he does.
Lost in Translation - The movie I had very, very high expectations of. It didn't wow me but it was a fun movie. I giggled, like in what, every other scene? I wonder why a lot of people rave about it and got so excellent movie reviews. Just wondering it's okay, I'm not movie guru. :)

Now I'm downnloading some albums (teehee) and will be watching Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist afterwards. I hope I will have energy left for tomorrow's badminton game. Lol. :D

It was fast. It was fun. It was maybe just for one-night of fun.

So I'm writing this in my blog to remind me to FOCUS. NOOOOOO JANSCI, NO! FOOOOOCUS.

ARRRRGH.

:(

This is supposed to be a lucky day but I sprained my ankle. I just hope that the medical fee will be covered by the company cos I'm really worried about my savings. :(

Lately, I've been forcing some discipline especially with handling my expenses and excessive amount of time I spend with my laptop. I suppose it's necessary to have a balance between the real life and the online life. It came to a point when I was in a mall and was disappointed for not bringing my laptop with me. Like, come on. It's just too much. Too much that my eyes are watery and hurt already. My internet abstinence and shopping-ban kinda works. Maybe, not sure. But I'm getting there.

As much as I don't want to harbor negative thoughts, but it just bothers me that some people who seem nice were apparently not as genuine as they seem to be. Why do some people cannot accept this two-letter word--'NO'.

Emotional blackmail is bullshit. :|

I want to buy a skateboard but afraid that I might regret it. I miss mama. I really wonder why she hasnt replied to my texts nor answering my calls. :(

Lord? Please? :D :D :D

This will be available in October at $499 so hopefully by December or next year it'll be few bucks cheaper! This news made me giddy and happy! Shet, I'm excited! I think it'll be perfect if ever I get to travel to Vietnam or somewhere. I seriously need to get away from everything even for a while because I'm choking already. <3

As I was listening to 'Before I Let You Go' by Freestyle in the train, suddenly I thought of Virgil. Is he my first love? I'm not sure. He plays guitar and has a voice--damn his voice--that will make you swoon. The guy can draw, too. He plays basketball and baseball; the captain of both. One of my best memories of high school is playing baseball with him after class. He's the kind of guy who everybody just loves and adores. Well I, on the other hand, was the quiet girl. The girl who likes to draw and it seemed that it was the only thing I have that is considered above average. I would follow friends wherever they go like an obedient puppy. Yes if you dig it, in my earlier life I was an introvert slash stupid slash sidekick slash soul-less. But I don't know what really drawn us to each other besides drawing. After high school grad, he gave me a letter to confess his love for me. Cute, right? Very high school. We had to move to my grandma's place and to cut expenses as well since I was going to college. Then there's the whole summer of no communication and the only time we got to see each other was in La Salle. The feeling subsided--there ya go, my first manifestation of being weak in the art of picking up the pieces left behind. We drifted apart although we were in the same uni. I've changed I guess and maybe it was the problem that I wanted him too. By change, I mean drastically. I skipped classes. I belonged to the loudest and slackiest group in my block. I went on night outs and alcohol was introduced to my system (and never managed to left until my third year in college). And because of these so-called changes, I just couldn't hang out with my high school friends anymore. I just couldn't hang out without being scolded or prayed over. So yeah, he went to Berlin and I went to Japan. My last memory of him was a bouquet of pink flowers for Valentine of 2007. Lately I read about him from a classmate that he's currently back to his place and teaching. He simply never fails to amaze me. How he can bear the rural life, that, my brain cannot comprehend. He hasn't changed much, and now, I don't want him ever to. The thought makes me smille. Yes, I do miss him. :)

I've been spending a lot lately. But they're good buys so should be okay and I don't feel any guilt.
I've been asked for date this December. Early noh?
The food I ate this week caused my forehead dilemma again. Or maybe since my period is due next week.
I need to save.
OknowIwillsleep.
Oh, I miss you Livejournal!

Man, I'm extremely happy right now! It's been 3 hours yet still I cannot stop gushing! <3 Thank you Cher, it really pays to have worked with ESPN. My day ended quite unexpected. I HEART Kobe Bryant. His talent and skill. His smile. The humor. Basketball. <3 What's not to love right? :)